It’s crazy isn’t it?
Only 2 weeks ago I was having a giggle at the panic toilet paper hoarding, and now we’re experiencing some of the toughest government restrictions we are ever likely to see in our lifetime (in our country at least.)
These are trying times, and they bring a lot of uncertainty, confusion, and changes for all of us.
This week I went through a period of frustration. I had this feeling like I should be DOING something. I should be making use of all this time, being productive, being helpful… but I just didn’t know WHAT to do. I felt antsy and on edge.
If you’ve been feeling the same, then this is the message for you.
I also spoke about it on facebook live earlier in the week… click below to watch, or keep reading for the full story.
Firstly, it’s important to know that YOU DON’T NEED TO DO ANYTHING.
You don’t need to use this time to work “on” your business. You don’t need to finally get through all those online courses you bought last year. You don’t need to start writing your book.
It’s totally ok – and you don’t need permission – to stay in bed all day. You can lie on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and catch up on Brooklyn 99 (I thoroughly enjoyed the latest season). You can go for long walks or you can order Uber eats everyday.
It doesn’t matter what you do or don’t do… Just get rid of that “should” voice in your head.
There is absolutely nothing you “should” be doing right now.
I want to share with you the thought patterns that have helped to quiet that insistent “should” voice in my head, in the hope that you can also feel better through this process.
There are 3 questions I’ve been asking myself…
“What I can control?”
“Where is the good?”
“Who can I help?”
Let’s expand on why these work…
1. What can I control?
Feeling out of control is one of the scariest feelings in the world.
As a human being, we are driven by an internal desire for control – for knowing, for security, for comfort and for things to stay the same. This is the first of our 6 core needs (according to Tony Robbins) called “Certainty.”
But we don’t want our whole lives to be controlled, do we?
Our second core need is the flip side of certainty: we also have a need for “Uncertainty” – otherwise known as variety, adventure, fun, drama. We like to spice things up, we like to experience change and freshness and creativity.
The way these two needs work, is they need to be in balance.
Each of us can handle a particular amount of Certainty before we get bored (this is when you pick a fight with your partner, crave a holiday, or go get a new haircut), and we can handle a certain amount of Adventure before we need to get home and back into our routine (think of the end of a 6-week trip around Europe, or having a friend stay in your home for 2 weeks… or the last few days of school holidays.)
At the moment, we’ve had a huge curveball of uncertainty thrown at the whole world, and it’s knocked us all for 6.
Suddenly, we’re working from home, we can’t fly interstate to visit family, our favourite restaurants have closed down and we can’t even get to a yoga class to unwind.
Since we’ve got so much Uncertainty going on, we need to do everything we can bring back Certainty and control into our lives, so we can feel normal again.
Some of the healthiest ways you can control your life include…
Cleaning the house
Morning routines
Meal planning
Now is an important time to keep your routines as regular as possible, so at least you have some control over those areas of your life, so you can handle the new challenges being presented.
One other thing that we can all control (with much more practice) is choosing our thoughts, and this brings me to my second question…
2. Where is the good?
The full question is “where is the good that I can focus on?”
We all know that what we focus on is what we get. As Tony Robbins says
“where attention goes, energy flows.”
If you’re constantly monitoring the news and its making you feel anxious and scared, then turn the TV off. You always have a choice about what you pay attention to.
I get that a lot of peoples’ circumstances have changed. You might have been stood down from work, you might be struggling financially, or someone you know might be sick.
But remember – there is ALWAYS something good to focus on.
Feeling good is what raises our vibration and lifts our energies. As the magnetic beings we are, we attract what we feel, so if you’re focusing on feeling good, you’re going to be attracting more good TO you.
What’s going good for you right now?
Do you have your health? Do all your limbs work? Can you use your eyes to look outside and see the sky and trees and neighbours? Can you use your ears to listen to an audiobook or talk on the phone? Have you got internet access? Do you live in a country that is relatively corruption free and is able to financially support most of its citizens? Is the electricity and water still on?
You can wallow in misery, but it will only make the situation worse. Raising your energies by consciously feeling good WILL have a powerful impact on the greater consciousness.
When you stop looking inward at problems, and begin to feel good, you can start to turn your attention to how you can help others.
3. Who can I help?
When we look at all the people who are suffering right now… the huge lines outside Centrelink, the overcrowded hospitals and the empty supermarket shelves, it’s heartbreaking and I know most of you out there want to find a way to help… but are daunted by the huge task of where to start?
Mother Teresa said
“If you can’t feed 100 people, then just feed 1.”
It’s not up to you to fix the world’s problems.
But if you can share toilet supplies with your neighbour, bake some food for a busy healthcare worker, do some shopping for an elderly person, or even just offer a supportive ear to your mum friends who are now home-schooling their kids, then you’re doing your part to change someone’s life for the better.
Even a smile on the street, and a kind word for the person serving you at the shops goes a long way.
I believe in you.
This might be a huge universal challenge from Mother Nature to all of us, but remember, there is nothing you NEED to do.
When you focus on the things you can control, what makes you feel GOOD, and helping just one person, we WILL ride this out together, and come through the other side stronger, more resilient and a tighter community.
I encourage you keep looking forward, help others focus on the good, and share what’s working for you – you never know who it will impact.
